Friday, September 29, 2006
Not a bad idea Cindy. Besides, I can't resist a "Triple-Dog-Dare". :)
Here is one of me at the beach this Summer. Kinda blurry but the best I can do on short notice.
Here is one from the band's company gig yesterday. (Recent enough CL?) I am at the sound board watching while my piece of crap guitar rots in the sun.
It was an end of Summer theme so we wore cool Hawaiian shirts. :)
I don't always catch her. But I always wish I did.
I hate seeing that 'missed call' thing on the phone. When I do I know that I've missed her again. It bums me out.
She called last night. I answered. She was surprised. I was happy. Hearing her voice is one of my most favorite things.
We talked. We laughed. We bitched, we commiserated, we shared, we helped each other be less confused. We giggled at the absurdity of it all.
Our little private corner of the universe is my most favorite place. I wonder if she knows that?
I wonder if she knows how welcome she is in my world? I wonder if she knows how much I appreciate her friendship? I wonder if she'd believe me if I told her?
I may try:
She is a special person. Her style is unique. Her outlook is unique. She is unique. There is only one. That is a shame. For everyone who doesn't get to know her, it is a shame.
I sit in wonder sometimes. Wonder at..... her. I sit and think "What if?" I sit and smile.
Today I was happier. Because last night she called. Last night I answered.
So I will use this little landmark, this 1200th post to tell her that I am thankful. That I am happy that I know her. That she makes me smile. That thinking of her even for just a second, warms me.
Thanks for your sparkle Luv. Life feels so good. :)
Yeah, my new instrument is broken. Its been finicky during practices but it was always easily fixed. Yesterday during the soundcheck it just wouldn't tune. Then once we finally got it right and started the first song, it went wacky again. I had to stop.
But the show went on. :)
I worked with that stupid thing the whole set but it wouldn't tune and stay that way. Then I grabbed the lead guitarists spare and it was so far out that I never got it right until the set was done. I had only two songs in the second set to play so the day was a bust basically. I did get lots of experience with the soundboard at least. Had to do something with myself.
Today my guitar is headed to the shop. That was frustrating.
But my song went well. I didn't totally screw it up. Actually I got a lot of ,"Gee, I didn't know you could sing" reactions from people. I guess I fooled them good! I can't sing. Lots and lots of practice will help anyone stay in key. Suckers!
So thats the update. I managed to play the very last song because the singer was really nervous and she dragged me up to stand with her. I played without plugging in. She felt better having me there for some reason. It was her debut singing solo in front of a crowd. She does a lot of backup singing in the band but it was her first lead vocal. She did great.
So it went well. Who knows? Maybe I'll volunteer for a second singing part?
Nah! That won't happen anytime soon. :)
Thursday, September 28, 2006
Today is the big day. The day this band I joined plays in front of an audience. I am looking forward to it... mostly. It has been 11.5 years since I did anything like this. I am rusty. Luckily a lot of the songs (3) are country (ie: easy) or old rock (ie: easy/familiar). I'm not at all worried about playing.
It's the singing. I have to sing one song. I got roped into it because there just isn't anyone else to do it. The women didn't want to sing the song, Take It Easy by the Eagles, and the one other guy couldn't. So I'm doing it. And I am mediocre at best.
We really need to find a decent male singer for this group.
I never was a good singer. I managed withing very limited range. I think I'll manage today. I'm just not looking forward to it.
Otherwise, today should be a blast. The company is having a lunchtime 'End of Summer Picnic' for the employees. There is food and stuff and they drafted the band to play. Personally, I don't think 5-6 weeks of playing together is enough time to be ready but we are going to wing it. As long as there aren't too many knowledgable musicians in the crowd, we will be able to fake out most people with all the "compromises" we've invented to be ready for this.
So wish me luck. Wish us luck I should say. Aside from the singing I am planning on having a pretty cool day. Ah, what 3-4 minutes of embarrassment compared to a free picnic and a half day off work? :)
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
I am. Outdoors all day, sunny and 72 degrees. Nothing to do but hang with the guys, suck down a few and hack up the course. Yeah, it's gonna be a tough day. :)
Sorry to rub it in but thats just the a-hole part of me coming to the surface. It gets the best of me sometimes.
Monday, September 25, 2006
I also knew it could be the best ever. The best choice I had made in decades. I felt it even before I thought it. Then the thought came and I was done. You don't escape truths like that. Not ever.
Funny that the thought didn't come from me. It was inside me. But I had to be told. It had to be verbalized to me so I could allow it to happen. That's when I weighed the potential disasters with the potential experience. There really wasn't a choice.
So now I'm in the thick of it. I'm in it and it's in me. I knew it was possible to be here, now, at this point. But I also thought I could swing it and avoid all the entanglement that comes along when you are not careful.
But can one really be that careful? Can one really control it all the way they think they will? I seriously doubt it.
Besides, controlling it would have made getting to his point impossible. And even though it's going to make it harder in the long run, I never will regret it. Once in a lifetimes are just that. They should never be taken for granted. They should never be regretted. So I won't. I couldn't anyway. No matter what.
So, for the record, so there is no mistaking my intentions at this point in time...... I say "damn the torpedoes."
Saturday, September 23, 2006
Thursday, September 21, 2006
Thanks. It's a Liz Claiborne. I got it on sale. Real cheap.
Nice. It's kinda sexy.
Yeah. Hey, maybe I need some Liz stuff too.
You like Liz clothes?
Well, maybe just some underwear.
Y'know, to be more sexy.
Nah, it wouldn't work.
Why? Because no one will see them?
Uhmm, Ok, yeah, uh-huh, that's why. (rolls eyes)
**Overheard in line at Starbuck's today. The person considering the underwear was a guy. For the record, the woman did look nice. :)
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
There are a lot of ways to express yourself. I have lots of things I say. Not too long ago I started saying "Gee whiz!" a lot. I started it as a way to make sure I didn't say swear words in the wrong place. You know, like when the boss is acting retarded and you want to say "WTF?" So now I say "gee whiz". Problem is I say it a lot. I know in some situations people hear that and wonder "WTF?"
I remember when I was with a band a few years ago we did a cover of Feeling Groovy. We all thought it was hilarious to walk around saying "Groovy" all the time. Problem is, once you start something like that it sometimes doesn't go away. I can't tell you how many times I've used the word groovy and someone has looked at me funny. It still happens even after all this time. But sometimes someone will like me using the word groovy. Then I wonder what they say without thinking?
The worst time I ever fell into that trap was when I was in the Summer between high school and college. I had a friend who liked to make fun of hippies. He would sometimes look at something and start saying "Wow! Far out man!" Far out. Where the hell did that come from anyway. So one day at college someone said something and I said "Far out man!" Totally making fun like my friend. But they took it as me being serious. One guy looked at me and said, "Far out?" Then they started laughing at me. I felt like a total dork. But how can you explain that you were trying to be funny without looking like you were covering up? Can't.
These days I just listen and wonder at what people say. Not long ago people would say "Word!" I still don't get that one. Others would say "All in that!" That's a weird one. It would be like this... I would say I was going to the Yankee game and someone would look at me and say "All in that!" Confused? Yeah, me too.
Today I think I'll listen to people more closely. I'll try to remember things they say, expressions they use. Then I'll try to post some. Tell me some of your expressions. I am curious to see what other people in other places say to express themselves. Who knows? Maybe I can replace my "gee whiz" with something more groovy. ;)
Monday, September 18, 2006
What made me think of this is that we were recently helping another friend move and he tried to kill some of us with his cheesey blasters. He and I were headed to the attic with something relatively heavy when he started giggling. That is the first warning you get with him. He giggles. So I just set the box down and walked back to the end of the hall. Naturally the stink followed us anyway. It was so rude smelling! Like he is rotten inside.
Then someone else came up and walked throught the hall. When they got to the stink spot they just stopped and started acting like they were gagging. Then he immediately turned to Stinky and gave him crap about it. He knew where it had come from without even asking. Stinky just giggled.
You see, we all know this guys stench too well. We also know that it will linger for a long time. Long enough to turn your stomach if you don't walk away. I think there is something wrong with his insides. He could be on an all water diet and still stink up the town.
I remember one time we went to the grocery store. We were in line talking to some other friends we had run into when he started giggling and walking away. He turned to me and said, "I think we should go now." I stepped forward and said, "Wait a second. I'm not done..." Thats when it hit me. The stink was unbelievable! Right in the front of the grocery store. He just kept on walking saying "We need to go now" and giggling.
The first time I experienced one of his cheesy blasters was a time when we were at this game room. It was a popular hangout in town (a looong time ago now). It was a crowded Friday night. He was playing some game and some of us were just hanging when he started giggling. Everyone looked at each other and started leaving. I was asking why they were leaving when it hit me. I couldn't believe it. I looked at him and said, "Did you do that!?!" He just giggled and kept playing the video game. I left the room. The whole place cleared out for about 10 minutes. All but him.
So he has been rotten for a very long time. The moving incident reminded me of how rotten. Stinky Boy Floyd is a good name for him I think. Pretty Boy Floyd was a notorious gangster back in the 30's. I think his type of gangster activity is almost as bad. He isn't killing anyone, but still......
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
You are 28% Rational, 71% Extroverted, 100% Brutal, and 71% Arrogant.
|You are the Class Clown. This means you wear grease paint and have a big, red nose... |
I really need to stop thinking so literally...
Anyway, I MEANT to say that you are the Class Clown, and this means that you are extroverted, mean, and arrogant. You are not very rational, so you gravitate towards things that produce feelings or emotions over thoughts (like fart jokes or spitballs, for instance). You are also an extrovert and rather full of yourself, so of course you want constant attention for yourself and think you are somehow better than others. (Upon hearing the expression "you are full of yourself", you probably also slyly feel the need to ask women if they would like to be "full of yourself" too. I am assuming you have a penis. I often make that assumption, being fond of the penis.) You can also be a bit mean-spirited, and like a class clown you wouldn't hesitate to make a joke at someone else's expense, no matter how terrible it would make them feel. A lot of people probably find your antics annoying, sophomoric, and desperately histrionic. Like some sort of crack-taking hyperactive monkey, you'd do anything, mock anyone, just to get someone to pay attention to you for five seconds. So your personality defects are that you have to be the center of attention, that you don't care about others, and that you are rather irrational and motivated by intuitions. Now stop walking around with those books on your head and sit down this instant! Or else I'll be forced to stand here, hands on my hips, doing nothing once again!
To put it less negatively:
1. You are more INTUITIVE than rational.
2. You are more EXTROVERTED than introverted.
3. You are more BRUTAL than gentle.
4. You are more ARROGANT than humble.
Your exact opposite is the Robot.
If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits.
The other personality types:
The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
|My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:|
|Link: The Personality Defect Test written by saint_gasoline on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test|
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
The reason? Because when you get a room full of women talking (and they do talk a lot) what do they talk about? C'mon ladies, you know what the major subject is... Ok I'll remind you. They talk about kids. Almost exclusively kids. Their kids. Each others kids. The kids in their families. The kids that are friends with their kids. Kids. Almost exclusively the topic is kids.
If they aren't talking about kids, which is rare, they are husband bashing. But I think that's funny so I don't mind. It kinda gives me an incite into what may be happening behind my back. :)
But they always come back to that one topic. They compare stories. Stories about being in labor. Stories about poopies and accidents and school and first words and first steps and dumb things kids do. No matter what the subject starts out to be it always goes back to breeding and the results.
It is exasperating.
I really don't mind the occasional cute story. They aren't so bad. I actually enjoy them sometimes. It's the never ending, same old rehashing of them that makes me nuts. I think they don't notice that even though their kid may have done something neato to them, it has already been done by some kid and talked about ad nauseum by some other parent in the same room.
I miss my days with Peachy. I miss Peachy and Spacebrain and Brownie and Kris and even the dopey Engineers back at the old job. At least when I had them I had some interesting things to discuss. Especially with Peachy. I really miss you Peachy. :(
So mostly when I go into the department these days I say hi and keep on moving. If I don't there will be stories about some kid and their antics of the night before. There will be pictures that I can not stand there and pretend to be interested in. (They always have pictures too. I swear they keep Kodak in business.) So I keep moving.
I know people love their kids. Thats a good thing. But to listen to it day in and day out makes me even more glad I was not caught in that trap. If I would ever wake up one day and find myself being so one dimensional it would be time to consider hari-kari.
Sunday, September 10, 2006
That tube it's in is only 3" x 4". Thats how tiny the bunny is. It ran into my garage when I was mowing. I scared it and 3 more out of a nest they had in my side yard. I didn't even know the nest was there.
Here it is when it ran into the garage. That leg is only 1 1/2" tall.
I managed to catch the bunny by using brand new leather gloves to nudge it into that white tube thingy. Then I put it into the nest again. I then managed to catch all the others and return them to the nest. I noticed then that the nest was showing the babies way too much. I think it was probably fine when they were smaller but it now was too shallow. So I went to the garden and cut out some turf and added it to the cover. The bunnies seemed to like it. :)
Then Momma Bunny stopped by. She started nursing the babies. It was neat to see.
If you look closely enough you will see tiny baby bunny feet sticking out from under Momma.
I am so glad that I didn't mow down the little buggers. That would have sucked. But they are safe now. Momma comes back every evening. Probably morning too but I don't see her. That nest is in the middle of our side yard so I guess we have adopted a family. I don't mind. But soon they will get big and start eating Nicci's garden. Then I wonder if she will still think they are so cute? ;)
Saturday, September 09, 2006
Is that the best thing you've heard in a while? A guy with a long list of criminal offenses including an almost murder, breaks into the woman's home. Then when she gets there she not only isn't freaked out but she proceeds to stramgle him to death. Ha!
When that guy gets to robber hell he's going to really pay for that one. Imagine all those bas ass dudes finding out that an unarmed woman killed his ass with her bare hands. An eternity of embarrassmant along with... well, you know the deal. I love it. :)
On a side note, has anyone seen Streamo? (Stream Of Consciousness) It appears that the site has been deleted. I think that sucks. There was a lot of good stuff on there. There were also a lot of participants and I know I didn't get a vote on whether or not to delete it. I'm sad.
Anyway, I'm off to help a friend move now. It should be fun. I never mind helping someone move. I hate to move myself though. But thats a different thing altogether.
Everyone have a happy Saturday.
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Depressing, ain't it?
It sure is. Thinking that the culmination of my life experiences had led me to that spot on the highway doing something no free person would ever really volunteer to do is a bummer.
Think about it. You are sitting there right now reading this. The culmination of all your life's moments have led you to this time where you are reading some bonehead spouting useless stuff like this. Does it feel right or wrong? Or does it not feel? Maybe you don't really care about it. That's cool. Some people don't.
My advice is this; don't think about it. That's what I decided to do after the great revelation this morning. I just let it go. No sense going nuts over something I can't change now. I put myself here and so I deserve where here is.
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Now that we have established that let's just admit to a couple of things here. Opposites definitely do attract. Easy to admit to. We have all experienced it I'm sure.
Next, people in 'the limelight' have strange dating habits. They will date anybody it seems. Doesn't seem to matter to them. Maybe they know it's all temporary anyway so they just go for it? I dunno.
But I have been the victim several times of falling for an opposite, so I get it. 3 times to be precise.
I have a habit of being attracted to the good girls. The ones who every normal guy would want to bring home to Mother. The problem(s) here are that I am not quite the normal guy and I really don't care what my Mother thinks about anything. Besides, if I liked someone I sure wouldn't want them to meet her anyway. But I digress...
I have been in 3 serious relationships that were doomed from the start. Every one of the women was pretty much from the same mold. A nice family girl. The girl next door type. Homemaker, sweet, innocent. The exact opposite of the woman I am compatible with. But thats who I sucker for. Even though I know it's wrong I still go for it. I am attracted to my opposite so much that my head gets lost until it's too late. Then I have screwed up both of us.
On the other hand, they seem to think they can tame me. Calm me down. Help me join the ranks of the domesticated. One even wrote me a letter after we split saying just that. She expected to be able to change me. Weird. Both of us. Weird.
So yeah, I get that opposites attract. I understand wanting the person you know you shouldn't have. But I also know (through personal experience) that even though opposites attract, it never works out.
So I say, good luck Paris/Lance. I hope you are just playing because it seems like a strange pairing. But what the hey? Have fun with it.
Now, Tom Cruise pairing with anyone at all, that is something else altogether. ;)
Sunday, September 03, 2006
I don't know exactly what I will write here. I am buzzing my ass off right now and enjoying the hell out of it. I went to my friend Tammie's birthday party earlier and had a blast. I also had a gallon or so of wine... Sutter Home White Zinfandel, Behringer White Zinfandel, two types of homemade wine and right now I am sipping on Bailey's Irish Cream to maintain the buzz. It was a lot of fun.
Maintenance is an art, btw. If you can't maintain without going over the edge, well.... then you suck I guess.
Anyway, right now I feel like calling My Girl Friday. (Yeah, that is code for someone almost no one knows about.) If I do she will be cool about it. If I don't and I tell her I thought about it then she will be either pissed or bummed, depending on which day she thinks about it. Strange thing that, being able to predict the negativity and the recurring reminders but not being able to predict which will happen on which day.
Ah hell, what do I care anyway? Temporary people are temporary people even when you don't want them to be temporary. They know they are temps and you know they are temps but one or the othr of you don't want to admit to it. Then the temp time expires and sudden;y one or the other finds themselves totally screwed in the head. It's the way it is. Fortunately I don't have a problem with my head. I know where and when and what I am all the time. Missing someones input is one thing. Missing someone is another. Get it? I get it.
I wonder why I'm writing right now? Probably because I'm feelin no pain. It's neat. I probably will look over this tomorrow and erase it. Read fast friends. Read fast. Of course I am way too private and I probably didn't give up any secrets anyway. Tell me Luv, did I? You would know the truth.
OK, wait a sec. I can't read some of this. Is there a spell check?
So now I'm going to bed. Buzzing and wishing I was elsewhere. Always wishing I was elsewhere. Good night blogger buds. Hug yourselves goodnight for me.
Saturday, September 02, 2006
Well it's not delicious. It's rotten."