I was thinking this morning that there are definitely some places in this world I would not shop. I'm not just referring to my fear of shopping at Kmart. I mean if someone opened certain stores I think I'd have to pass.
For example:
The Day Old Deli & Bakery - Sorry, some of that deli stuff tastes old to begin with. When you know it's old before you go in there are no guarantees about what it's like. And some weird stuff can grow quickly in old tuna salad. The cool part is that the free day old bread can be softened up well with the runny stuff oozing from the tuna or chicken sald you get. That would help.
The Slightly Past the Expiration Grocery - The expiration dates are on there as a 'guideline', true. But who would buy food already expired? Besides, who eats all the stuff they buy before the last day anyway? No thanks.
A South American Imports Drug Store - First, they may not be well regulated since they are probably importing all the 'good stuff' under the table, so to speak. Second, I don't want drugs imported in someones bowels. Pass.
The Big & Tall, You'll Eventually Fit Them Clothes Store - This place sells clothes that you are supposed to literally grow into. You get a free guide on how to start your "eat till I explode diet" right away. Obesity is the in thing at this store. (It's the American way, right?) Can you imagine the mannequins at this place?
The Uninspired Electronics Store - They make all kinds of cool things like an electronic dog polisher and an automatic hairbrush for bald guys. Yeah, real cool stuff. You get a free set of used, almost dead batteries with every purchase.
The Pre-Owned Sex Toy Shop. - Sorry, that idea is just gross. You never know where those things have been. Plus the mens used toys could cause serious feelings of inadequacy since they may have been used by someone... uhmm shall we say "larger" than the person who purchases it. Unless you get to try things out before you buy in which case you would know not to buy. Whatever... No thanks.
These are places I think I'd avoid. Take my advice and skip the experience should you encounter any of these shops.
2 comments:
EWWWW perhaps I should have skipped that post. It was only the 2nd one of the day I've read and now I'm scarred.
Sorry Meritt, I never know where my brain will lead me pre-coffee. I hope you can shake it off quickly. :)
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