Schmoopy Post Time

Here's the promised Schmoopy Post. I had to change the name of the person who inspired this so don't take that as real, but the feelings at the time were very real. Try not to cry too much. Also, keep a puke bucket handy. It may be needed.


A Vision...

... I’m standing in the middle of a long, long road. Don’t know how I got there. Don’t know where I’m going. Brains all foggy. Little bit confused. Feeling rung out.

I start looking around. As I look to the right, I see shapes along the road. Shapes that become clearer as my focus improves. That is the way I had come. That is what’s behind me. My past.

I start to look at where I’ve been. I see everything. Some hills that were tough to climb. Some valleys that were pretty deep. Some dark spots. Some bright spots. Some spots where I must have backtracked a bit. Some places where the footprints just go in circles.

As I stand mesmerized, I look back and see one very bright spot. A spot I remember well. And I smile. A giant toothy smile that threatens to crack my face. The spot is covered with Kristina. Everywhere there is the sight, sound, smell, feel and wonder of Kristina. I realize there are now tears on my face. That bright spot is the day my Kristina joined me on my road.

It’s easy to see this spot in the long road. After the day Kris shows up, the road becomes much smoother. The road becomes brighter and the hills and valleys are much easier to traverse. It’s easy to see when the light is so good.

It’s so bright it tempts me to go back, for just a little while. I turn for just a moment and feel the warmth of that bright day. That Kristina day. I close my eyes and bask in the warmth of it. I draw strength from it. I breathe better. I feel whole.

But I know I can’t go back, so I turn to the left. This direction is the right direction. The way into tomorrow. I’m drawn back to the Kristina day, but there is no going back.

As I look ahead, I see there before me the same smooth, bright road. The Kristina road. And I see that I don’t need to go back. That my love is waiting for me to continue on the road. Not alone, but together. There is no impatience in her eyes. Just understanding. Understanding that a dreamer like me can make the road rougher than it needs to be. The beautiful smile draws me in. The warm hand in mine renews my strength. No more brain fog. No more confusion. No more rung out feeling.

As we move on together, the road becomes brighter. The way is easier. I don’t know how I ever got so far without my Kris, but I know for sure, I won’t be on this road again without her.

I glance back once more at the past. It’s nice to look, but life must be lived forward. I turn again to the future. No longer lonely. No longer afraid. No longer lost. And I whisper a quick prayer of thanks for my Kristina as we move on.