Welcome To BS Friday

Welcome once again to BS Friday. You know the drill, I write it, you try to guess if it’s real or just plain old BS. Today’s post is called: Too Much Information


When I was in High School, I was a bit of an oddball. Not the weird kind. The kind that didn’t fit into any one clique but fit into almost any clique at the same time. I played on the Baseball Team and the Tennis team, which got me in with the Jocks Clique. I was a Chess team member and was in all the advanced classes, which got me into the Geek Clique. I was from a very poor family in a very bad part of town, which got me in with the scumbag/stoner/roughneck Clique. You know those people, they are the Clique that despised cliques in general.

The one clique that almost everyone remembers me for is the Artist Clique. All through school, starting at a very young age, I was known as an Artist. That was the group I liked best too. They were the most creative and the most unpredictable. Even more unpredictable than the stoners and scumbags.

One day at school I was hanging with a few artsy friends in the school auditorium. We were the Stage and Lighting crew for any plays and concerts that would be done by whichever group would be scheduled that week. Most of us were in those groups too (I was in Glee Club, go ahead and laugh.) so the crew was kinda large to make sure every show was covered.

This particular day one of the techno geeks was there and he started demonstrating his new toy for tapping into the school announcement system. He could plug into almost any audio jack available and transmit anything he wanted to. Keep in mind, this was 1981 and it was a big deal to figure out stuff like that back then. Naturally we decided we needed to shake things up a bit with this newfound super-power. The problem was, we couldn’t decide what we would have to broadcast over the entire school audio system. Some argued for loud music. Some argued for dirty jokes. Some wanted to do a made up public service announcement. The notion then came around that it would be really cool to record one of the Teachers or even the Principal in a conversation that was, hopefully, embarrassing to them. That would be the ultimate choice. Now we just had to figure out who and what and how we were going to get this recording. Also keep in mind that cassette tapes were fairly new then too and those little recorders were rare.

We decided that it would be best to bug the Teacher’s Lounge to get some good stuff. So, being the trusted geeks we were (which meant one of us usually had a key to anywhere in the school at some point) we coordinated our efforts and managed to plant 3 microphones in the lounge with three remote recorders going. Of course, they had to be manually started and stopped so we had to plan carefully. During one afternoon of taping a small group of men teachers we hit the jackpot. They were talking about having a stripper come into the school and do a little show for them for one teacher’s birthday. The best part was that the girl had graduated from the school a few years before. We were psyched!

On the night of the strippers arrival, we all were in attendance. It was a Saturday night and the school was supposed to be closed. It was hard to fit 11 guys around the “peeking” area that was available. We had made a few minor adjustments to the drop ceiling so we could see and hear what was happening. The teachers were drinking and rowdy and it was hard for us students to hole back our laughter. Finally the stripper showed up. We became deadly serious and had our tapes running. I didn’t recognize her but a couple of the other guys did. She began the usual flirtation and dancing and then off came the clothes. She was hottt! The guest of honor got some special attention. She hung around doing naked things for about a half hour, then she kissed each one of the guys in attendance. I have since learned that they don’t do that anymore. She even signed a few pics for them before she left. As she was leaving she turned and asked Mr. Birthday guy if he was coming along. She had promised a special night for him and she wanted to pay up.

We couldn’t believe what we were seeing. The party continued in the room for a while. A couple of our guys snuck out to follow the teacher and the stripper. It turned out that she took him to his car and did him in the back seat! Apparently she had a thing for this teacher when she was in school or something.

Later that night we all got together. I admit to being mildly in shock. I think a few of us were. That Teacher was not only a popular one but his wife was an Art teacher in the school. She was maybe the most popular Teacher there. We had gotten more info than we had bargained for. None of us we ready to broadcast what we had seen and heard.

On Monday we decided we would just forget the whole idea. It had lost it’s fun now. I never looked at that Teacher the same way again nor could I help but feel bad for Mrs. Birthday boy. (That didn’t last long but the reason is a story for another time.)

Sometimes you do get more than you bargained for, even when it’s supposed to be just for fun.