I just got back from a supposedly quick trip to the supermarket. Anyone who has been reading this blog for a while probably remembers all the fun & free entertainment I find shopping there. Not so since I moved to this little town. Trips to the supermarket here are terrible experiences. They just keep getting worse every time too.
This time I went for some necessities; milk (gotta have it for tomorrow's coffee) ice cream, and Peeps. I hate to be out of Peeps. So I get into the express lane and there are just 2 people ahead of me. One person almost done and this weird old lady right in front of me. She is standing there and looking at the gossip mags and clicking her tongue. Shaking her head and clicking he tongue. I was amused.
She suddenly looks up at me as if I had magically appeared. Her eyes got real wide and she leaned back and said "What?" real loud. I started laughing and couldn't answer her. Not just because I hadn't even said anything but because she looked like the woman from Seinfeld when Kramer had gone to L.A. trying to make it as an actor. Remember the old lady has-been who told the cops Kramer was in love with her? She looked exactly like her! All that caked on makeup and fake color hair and 50's style bouffant hairdo. It was funny.
My fun was short-lived though. The girl at the counter had to call to her to get her to move up. Then she took forever getting her stuff onto the conveyor. Then when the girl tells her the total, she breaks out her checkbook. She hadn't even gotten it out of her purse yet. Then she proceeds to write in the ledger part. I'm thinking, "You have to be kidding me." Then she starts writing the check. I was stunned. Do people still do that these days? Not just the check writing thing but are they really so rude as to not be ready when they are in the express lane in the supermarket?
People behind me were already bailing out into other lines. I noticed people who had gotten into regular lanes after I got into the express lane already leaving. I was now annoyed. Naturally, this couldn't be the end of the frustrations.
The girl put the check into the machine and her face went blank. Then she fiddled with it a little and just stood back and looked at it. She fiddled a bit more and then she looked at me and said, "My computer locked up. I need to get help." Next thing I know she's walking away. Great!
The old beyotch who started all this mess turned and got real close to me and cackled, "What did she say?" I stepped back, reeling from her breath Before I could yell at her stupid ass that "she had screwed up the machine with her stinking, lousy check that took her an hour to write!" the girl and a Manager came back. They messed with the thing for a while and finally got it working again. I was relieved. This short trip had turned into a long irritating trip.
Just when I thought it was over, the girl looked at the old beyotch and told her she had earned enough points for some kind of coupon thing. I knew we were in trouble when the old bag just stared at her blankly. The girl tried hard for several minutes to explain what she was talking about but the oldie just couldn't grasp what she was telling her. She tried to put it as basic as possible; "You can have a coupon for a free ham if you want it!" That the old lady understood. She said she wanted a free ham coupon. Whew! The girl printed it and finally the woman left.
I was in that store gathering stuff for 5 minutes. I was in that line, the express lane with only 2 people ahead of me, for 25 minutes. I could have screamed.
When I went outside, there was the old woman, still loading her 3 bags into her car. She was still there after I had checked out and headed home. I have no idea how people get to be like that woman. I sure hope I am dead before I get to that stage in life.
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