Old People Food

Last night Nicci came home and immediately wanted to go out for dinner. I wasn't really into it but I went. We went to one of the many 'old people places' in town. By 'old people places' I mean one of those restaurants that cater to the older crowds. Just like on Seinfeld, they have big dinner crowds starting at 4:00 in the afternoon. The mad rush is usually over by 6:00. The food is mostly good but generic style and usually there is a buffet. My town, being populated by probably 75% old farts, is full of 'old people places'.

Well, this one doesn't disappoint. It has a good variety on the buffet and the dessert bar is great. The clientele is what cracks me up. We were surrounded by blue hair and giant bellies and loud talking people. Just walking in I started laughing.

There was this one guy next to us that "couldn't pass that up!" What I mean is that he said he "couldn't pass that up!" 4 times after coming back from the buffet. 4 times he went back and I remember wondering how he couldn't pass up a giant pile of sauerkraut and another pile of Lima Beans. Who can eat that stuff? I passed those up every time.

The table in front of us had the biggest belly I think I've ever seen sitting there. The guy was not real tall but his belly was amazing. He made many trips to the buffet so I could see he was into keeping his belly toned. Like that skit on The Kids In The Hall where they all had big guts, he was 'keeping it fit'. :)

I felt kinda bad for him though because he was with 2 of the most annoying and dominating women ever. The one woman, who had glowing blue hair, talked the whole time we were there. She hardly ate anything but she jabbered incessantly and her voice was loud and crackly. The other woman talked a little and when the guy would venture to say something, one or the other would cut him off or tell him he was 'off base'. They used that term about 275 times that night. Mostly the guy just grunted or nodded when they said something to him. I eventually could see why he was so quiet.

Have you ever noticed that when old people get together they have mostly one topic of conversation? Yep, they do. Mostly it's all about their adventures with healh care. Everywhere around us the conversations were about who had this operation, what Doctor told them this, which friend was ill and where they were and what home they were in. It was amazing. Plus it was easy to hear all the details since they all talked so loud. Nicci believes it's because they are all going deaf. I've noticed this phenomena before since I've been spending time with my Uncle so much. When his old buds come around, they always talk about the same things. Weird.

Later in the evening I just started smiling about it all. Nicci and I decided we should join in so we started making up stories about going to the Doctor and family that were being treated for health problems. Before we left our entire family had been operated on, poked and prodded and taken to retirement homes 4 times. Suddenly the family wasn't so healthy anymore. :)

It was a fun night. The food was OK but today I have indigestion from it all. Basically, I think the next time I go there will have to be with a special invite from my Aunt & Uncle. It's one of their favorite places, naturally. Otherwise, I will just stick with KFC.