Last night I was sitting in the dark looking at the snow. I started thinking about the times when I was a kid and I'd build a snow fort or one of those tunnels or something and then I'd lay down waiting for someone to come by. I remembered how the snow started out feeling cold but soon it felt warm and cozy and then I started getting sleepy. I know that I easily could have slept there. The thing is, I now know that people can freeze to death like that and not even know it. I didn't know it then.
As I was remembering those times I started wanting to go outside and lay in the snow and fall asleep. I wanted to cover myself up and get into that nice cozy, warm space and sleep. I wanted to not wake up.
For the one second that that thought was in my head I felt so relieved. I felt like it would be so good. It felt like the right thing to do. That one second was so seductive, so alluring and so hard to resist that it felt like it lasted an hour. For one second, I wanted to go and lay in the snow and sleep. Forever.
I know it was only one second of what some may consider insanity. But it had quite a draw. It still is in my head and I now wonder wtf is up. Weird.
One second can seem like an hour sometimes.
** Edited: No, I'm not suicidal or anything like that. No one freak out. It was just something weird that happened and I'm wondering why it seemed so cool.
No comments:
Post a Comment