A Little Help Please

Yesterday Nicci and I stopped in Bed, Bath and Beyond for some rug cleaner stuff she wanted. Now, I knew going in that there is no such thing as going in for 'just one thing'. I don't mind this store too much though. There's lots of neato things for me to look at.

As we walked in a clerk walked up to us, asked us how we were and if she could help us in any way. Well, being the decent person Nicci is she replied she was fine and inquired as to how the clerk was doing. When she did, the woman's eyes lit up. She even exclaimed that she was fine, thanks, and that no one had ever asked how she was before. (I assumed she meant in this setting. I'd really have felt bad for her otherwise.) I should have known this would lead to another interesting development.

As we headed to the area where our 1 item was, we stopped to look at dish towels. Nicci remembered that she needed to replace some older ones in the kitchen. Well, Happy Clerk immediately jumped out from behind a towel rack offering to help us find whatever we needed. Nicci explained that she had gotten these particular dish towels from a catalog and she loved them, but had never seen them in any store and that’s what she was looking to see if she could find. Well, this sent Happy Clerk into a tizzy. She must have taken half a dozen different towel types down to show us, none of which was anything near to what we had described to her. We mentioned that they were all white. She showed us all prints. ??? I guess she just wanted to help us out really bad. After about 10 minutes of re-re-describing what we were looking for we finally managed to extricate ourselves from the aisle of the hopeless helper.

We didn't get very far when Happy Clerk pops out from around the corner with a new towel selection that still didn't resemble in the least what we had described. Nicci was very patient with her and told her again what it was we would be interested in.

We moved a little further along the main aisle of the store to where our 1 item actually was, got what we had come for and headed toward the back of the store, just to browse on our way out. Before we got too far, Happy Clerk showed up again with yet another suggestion for us to look at. Now I was getting worried. She started reminding me of a gnat that wouldn't go away. Eventually you have to squash a gnat to get rid of them. Once again we let her know that what she had chosen wan NO WHERE NEAR to what we had described. Once she walked back to her area where she was no doubt trolling for others to kill with assistance, Nicci and I hurried to the other side of the store, laughing at the irony of it all. Normally you can’t get anyone to help you at all in these places. This person wanted to help us to death.

Well, we almost made it out, but of course the bedding area stopped us and we lingered too long. Who should pop up but Happy Clerk with 2 more colorful choices in her hands. We were on the opposite side of the store in an area where she herself had told us that someone else would help us with anything we needed. I almost started laughing in her face when she showed up again. When she heard that her newest choices weren’t going to work again, she decided that she would show us where some material was that we could probably make the dish towels with. Bed sheets. She wanted us to buy bed sheets and make the towels. Once again… ???

Well, we made it to the checkout and almost out of the store. At the checkout Nicci noticed that the can of carpet stuff had a big dent and a broken cap. The lady at the checkout asked if we wanted to exchange it. Nicci and I just looked at each other and started laughing. The carpet stuff was located right in the center of Happy Clerk’s territory. Kinda like in the middle of the Bermuda Triangle. I volunteered for the hazardous duty. I hurried along the aisle and when I saw her luckily she had her back to me. I zipped around behind her walking like one of those weird ‘speed walkers’ and made it safely to the shelf, got the cleaner and turned to make my escape. As I turned I saw her looking my way, her face lighting up like a Christmas tree. My mind quickly ran through my options and without much thought, I turned and speed walked all the way around the store the long way back to the front doors. I was winded by the end, but I did manage to outrun our over-exuberant friend.

This person was quite the opposite of store clerks you usually meet. It was hard to be annoyed with her since she was being too helpful. To the point of being obnoxious helpful! I have to wonder if she would have been that way if we hadn’t started out by being friendly to her first?