I invented this one all by myself (with a little help via internet). It is the most profound quiz appearing in the blog world to date.
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds? - This just proves that all language education is a sham.
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations? - What if the world was all hypothetical?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose? - How could it not? Plus, I’ll bet the brown ones spew chocolate milk!
If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan? - This is something I’ve always wondered. How do they do what they do?
If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights? - It either gets dark or you have to pass, like on the highway. Now I wonder how you signal to pass?
Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo? - My experience is when you transport by ship, it should be called slow-go.
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio? - I do this. I think the radio interferes with my brain waves reaching out to the desired location telepathically.
If you try to fail and succeed, what have you done? - Reversed the entire karma of the universe!
Why is the time when the traffic is slowest called rush-hour? - For me, because I’m in a rush to kick the crap out of all the lousy drivers getting in my way.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you need to buy her friends? - Because the truth is she’s a stuck-up, backstabbing beotch. Don’t believe the PR.
When cheese gets its picture taken what does it say? - Limburger.
Why are a wise-man and a wise-guy opposites? - Because you can always believe a wise-guy. Most wise men are wise asses. (Uhm, did I say that right?)
If the #2 pencil the most popular, why is it still #2? - Because no one likes a front runner. Let’s hear it for the underdog #2 pencil!
Can fat people go skinny-dipping? - I only hope they don’t when I am there.
Why do they announce power shortages on TV? - Because the announcers have the IQ of an icecube. (Usually.)
Why do you press harder on the remote-control when you know the battery is dead? - I don’t. I wring out all the remaining juice from the batteries like I wring a wash cloth. It sort of makes my remote look oddly shaped, but I get full usage out of those batteries.
If it’s zero degrees tonight, and tomorrow it’s meant to be twice as cold, how cold will it be? - Let’s see, 0 x 0 = Damn cold!
Who’s cruel idea was it to put an 'S' in 'lisp'? - I don’t know, but I think it’s pretty funny. I’m sorry it wasn’t me that thought of this one. (For all you know, it wasn’t anyway.)
8 comments:
HAH! love those...
my fave has always been the teflon one... i still don't get it. :P
Thanks Ropemonkey and J. I was in a silly but serious mood this morning. Can't tell, can ya?
Veronica, during the so called rush hour I'm pretty much parked on the 'parkway'.
I think the driveway was named because of bad drivers. You know, "Hey, drive way over here so you don't hit my house!"
I'm guilty of the remote one and the radio one.:) I wonder shit like this all the time. A great post for sure.:)
Ha ha. Very funny, Bob!
I do the radio and remote one too.
As for the #2 pencil...I do actually know the answer to that. The # designates the softness of the lead. Artists will use different types of lead to achieve different results in their work. (#1 is hardest, #4 is softest) See, there is a brain hidden somewhere behind these looks. ;-)
I think I recall reading somewhere in your blog that you are an artist, right? So, you would have already known the answer to that anyway.
um do you want us to answer your questions?
Hey Nina, I think those two are the ones most of us do. Summer admitted to them also. I really do find myself wondering strange things like this all the time.
Thanks Ian. I try, but I can't match you in the humor department.
Summer, you have been reading this blog for a little while. I am a part timer in the art world and I have samples of all types of pencils. This was just a fun question. You, Nina and I have admitted to the remote and the radio ones. I'll bet there are a few more who haven't fessed up yet.
Moonchild, I think it would be funny to hear other people's answers to these. Go for it!
The reason why "phonetic" isn't spelled the way it sounds is because the orthography (writing system) of English doesn't exactly correlate to it's inventory of phonemes (possible sounds of the language). Overall though, English does a pretty good job (compared to let's say, Kanji). Using the International Phonetic Alphabet, the word "phonetic" is spelled exactly the way it sounds.
I'm sorry. You asked...
- from a girl who never passes up an opportunity to be a smarty pants.
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