I haven't done any of my own writing since Thursday. I guess I've been in one of those 'Bloggers Block' periods.
So I tried to do something this morning, but it came out very negative. I gave up.
Here's my latest head-trip; lately I've noticed how tough it is for me to stick to a 'normal' lifestyle. I don't know if anyone out there has experienced this, so I'll try to explain it as best I can.
You know sayings like 'you can take the boy out of the city but you can't take the city out of the boy'? There are many different variations of this one. Well, that's how I see my struggles with the normal, grown-up lifestyle. I don't handle it well.
I believe it's OK if someone settles down and never has had the opportunity to go nuts in their life. By going nuts, I mean doing things like partying a lot, being spontaneous and just disappearing for long weekends, living without anyone to answer to but your own conscience. That kind of stuff.
But the opposite is tough for someone who was used to living that way and tries to settle down after. Sort of 'you can take the freedom from the boy but you can't keep the boy from craving his freedom.' It's very hard for 'the bad boy' to turn into the 'good boy' and learn to like it. It's probably not so tough for the 'good boy' to stay the 'good boy' since he doesn't know what he's missing. (I think that's true at least.)
Bottom line is, the innocent should stay innocent. Then they wouldn't have to go through the constant withdraw from a life that held much more living in it.
That sounds weird reading it. I know what I'm trying to say, but I'm still having a hard time expressing it. Maybe the word innocent should be sheltered? Maybe the "much more living" part should be "much more adventure"? I'm not trying to sound like an ass. I'm just trying to get this straight.
Here it is, lately I find life more and more boring and routine. The weekends are even boring. The only saving grace is that I'm not at work on the weekends. But I did go to work 2 weekends in a row recently. That's nuts for me to do, but it broke the monotany. Sheesh!
Well I'm just spinning my wheels here. Maybe this makes sense to someone. Maybe I should have waited to tackle it when my block was gone. Maybe I just don't know what I'm talking about.
I do know this, it is going to be a long night. Again.
8 comments:
Hang in there little buddy. I know the feeling. I hate it when Michael and I can't agree what to do with the weekend. We end up doing nothing four weekends straight. Most of the time we don't even enjoy doing the same things. So here's what you do...
First, talk about it. Then if things are still stale take one day for Nicci to do her thing while you do yours. Save the other day for something fun together. An alternative would be for you both to try something totally new together. Everyone has ruts and you my friend, sound like that's all your in. No worries.:)
Nina had a good suggestion. Tell Nicci she HAS to go do something new with you. Let her pick what she wants to do (although I have an idea she wouldn't be into it). Tell her it's for your sanity. That's always something to consider. Otherwise, next time I go riding, you can ride on the back with me. How about that for some adventure? You can be my first passenger. hee hee.
All good suggestions. Nina is the voice of reason, for sure. Nicci and I do talk about these moods I get into, but she's been a more sheltered person all her life. We are complete opposites in just about every way. Those discussions sometimes go awry.
This may be just a rut. Hope so. I'm one of those people who have their 7 year itch about every 7 months, so we'll see.
John, the Axis & Allies thing is a good idea. Maybe if we plan it we'll actually do it. We've blown it before, but I'm in.
Peachy, I'd love to be your first passenger. No matter what's going on, that would be great!
I've always been an innocent. (read: dull). Whereas Shawn had this mega-love affair with alcohol. I don't drink, don't smoke (what do I do? :)), do drugs. Never have. I hate going out to bars at night because it's night, it's smokey, there are way too many people. I'm the type of gal who likes to be in bed by 9pm - mostly because I am so friggin' exhausted.
Lately I've had this itch to go out and party a little. Maybe dance the night away. If I can stay up late enough to accomplish that task that is. :) Shawn has taken quite nicely to settling down and doesn't want to do that any more (plus he never dances, heh).
I suppose I should try and stay innocent, but I've always wanted to be the Bad Girl. My sister was and I have always been the Good Girl. I'll be 29 in two months, I'd like to have attempted Bad just once before I get really old. :)
Beware the dark side Cat. Seductive, it is.
(That's my Nina/Yoda impression.)
I definitely know where you're coming from. I was once a party every night girl. Then I got married, got pregnant, and moved to a different state. Went from being out every night to never leaving the house.
Sometimes, I still get the itch to go out and let my hair down. And sometimes I actually manage to do it!
Hope you're feeling better now. Sorry I don't have any sage advice to share.
Lynn, thanks for stopping by. I do feel better, for now. We'll see what happens next weekend. That's when I have the tough moments.
Cute, you are.
Hope the weekend turned out alright for ya.:)
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