Rules Of Attraction a La YB

My blogger friend Nina had this post yesterday about guys looking at women and deciding right away if they were sex material. Her questions caused me to start thinking about how people were initially attracted to each other and then later decide to get to know each other better. I started wondering what the ‘Rules Of Attraction’ were and came up with the obvious answer; the rules are different for everyone. I know, that was earth shattering, but it’s true. So now I’ve decided to try to determine what my personal rules are. (I hadn’t really thought about it too much before now.) I’m not talking about the initial sighting and thinking about a woman’s ‘attributes’ that appeal on first glance. Everyone has those reactions. I’m talking about what would cause me to want to know someone better than just a fleeting acknowledgement. So, without further ado, here are my personal ‘Rules Of Attraction”:

The first things I notice are a woman’s eyes. Not just how pretty they are but how expressive they are. How they react to different situations is always reflected in the eyes. Whether there is honesty there, true emotion or just a cold non-interested person wearing them. My Grandmother always said, “The truth is in the eyes”, and I believe her still. I knew a woman once, Kelly, who’s eyes were the most expressive imaginable. You could tell every reaction she was having by watching her eyes. She could give you a look and make you want to coddle her and protect her and keep her safe. She told me more than once how she had realized very young that certain expressions would get her to melt someone so easily and she could get them to do almost anything for her. This I believed having been sucked in by her. She turned out to be bad news, but I don’t regret knowing her.


Second is the smile. A warm, genuine smile really can suck me in. When a woman smiles and it lights up her whole face, with the little laugh crinkles at the corners of her eyes, I will make it a point to get to know her. Someone who smiles easily without forcing it is usually a warm, fun person to know. Laughter is the best medicine, they say, and I believe it. I once had a friend named Diane who had a ‘pretty smile’ but it got nowhere near reaching her eyes. She was a disciple of the ‘I, Me, My Generation’ and everything in her world revolved around her. If it didn’t, it was quickly disposed of. She was beautiful and had no shortage of guys, but none stayed with too long. They should have noticed the forced smile before getting sucked in by the sex. They would have been better off. Funny thing about D, she knew this about herself too. She just didn’t care.

Last rule for me is to watch the body language. If someone is interested, you can see it. Not just in their stance, but are they looking at you when they talk, are they fidgeting, that kind of stuff. I like the touchy/feely type. When they talk to you, they put their hand on your shoulder or something like that. Someone like that strikes me as more open than someone who is standoffish and too shy to get closer. This doesn’t mean that shy people suck or anything. I’m just writing down my personal preferences. I like an outgoing, open person who isn’t afraid of new experiences. I like adventures, so I prefer someone who does too. Their body language will give you clues as to what type of person they could be.

Well, there you have it, my personal Rules. For what it’s worth. That’s one of the things I like most about blog friends, they make you think about things you might normally never think about. I guess Nina sent me down this path inadvertently. It’s been fun.