Nicknames Come From.... ???

I've decided I would really like a cool nickname. I see all these people with nicknames and I like it. Well, maybe not all of them, but some. Problem is, with a name so bland like 'Bob', what can you make of that?

Some names just beg for nicknames, like 'JLo' and 'ARod'. Others, I don't have a clue as to where they come from, like 'P. Diddy'. The one he had before that, 'Puff Daddy', was sort of like advertising his bad habits, don't you think? I'll skip going in that direction.

I've noticed there are a lot of people using the nickname 'Edge'. There is the guitarist for U2. There is Veronica's sweetie. I've known another 2 people who called themselves 'Edge'. How do you get that name? I'd like to be a cool Edge person. Speaking of U2, what's a 'Bono'? There's one I don't get.

When I was playing ball regularly I had several names that people called me. Mostly intended as insults, but it was all in good fun. (I think.) One was 'Candy'. That was short for 'candy arm' because our shortstop thought I had a weak throwing arm. He was right, but I was a second baseman anyway. It only showed up when I was at third. Another name he called me was 'Teflon', meaning no stick. (Stick as in batting.) One guy referred to me as 'a maggot infested piece of roadkill', but that one didn't stick.

For a while the guys were calling me 'Jeter' because of my rabid Yankeedom. I didn't like that one. First, I was a second baseman, not a shortstop. Second, I was an average player, not awesome like Jeter, so I thought it was an insult to him. I tried to stop that one quick.

But all the cool names come from somewhere and I would like to know the formula. How does one get a name like 'Snoop Dog' or 'B.A.' (Mr. T on the A-Team) or 'The Big Bad' (Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer) or even 'Eminem' (who I can't stand, but the name is cool). Maybe you have to do something awesome before you earn one? Maybe you just have to tell people "Call me *****" ? I don't know, but it does make me wonder.

I guess I could be B.Ob, (pronounced beeob) if I tried to use my own name. That's not so cool though. Kind of sounds like a cartoon animal or something. The nickname Yankeebob came from someone being very upset with me after the Yankees won the World Series against the Mets. That guy was so funny. He got really mad because I had no sympathy for the Mets losing. He was almost yelling at me in my office saying something like "You Yankee fans are all alike. Winning is everything. You're so obnoxious. From now on I'll think of you as a Yankee, Bob, and nothing else!" He meant it as an insult, but I took it as a compliment. A major compliment. It made him even madder when he found out I used that name for e-mail addresses and stuff.

Come to think of it, I'll just stick with Yankeebob. That one suits me.